Monday, March 24, 2008

Am I a bitch?

I went shopping the other morning, after working all night. No big deal, just the local Goodwill. At the register, the sullen cashier did not say a word to me as I put all my goodies on the counter and even pulled the hangers off of the clothing for her. So after I put the cart back and watched her ring everything up, I just said "I'm fine, thank you for asking" in a chipper way and smiled at her. No response. Just the total amount. And after signing the receipt, still nothing. So I said "Oh you're welcome!" in an even more manic voice.

I totally feel like I am a bitter little old lady but come on! I worked in stores throughout high school, not THAT long ago and I remember being taught not to chew gum, to greet customers and to thank them. And now I just wonder what the hell is wrong with "young people" today. GD whippersnappers can't even say hello to a paying customer? I think I am usually a nice person, but this whole experience made me feel old and crotchety. I guess every generation thinks the ones after their own are going to hell in a handbasket, but is 32 too young to be this convinced of it?

Monday, March 10, 2008

A little story about little me

Ok, so it was my birthday last week, so I thought I would share a birthday story with the world.

When I was about 7 or 8, I was invited to a birthday party for Jessica P, who lived down the block from me. It was to be held at McDonalds, where ALL the parties were. Suck on that, MTV's Sweet Sixteen! Anyway, Jessica wasn't really a good friend of mine. I think she was a year or so younger than me, which was a VERY important detail at the time, and she was also boring. She was the "friend" I played with only when my top tier friends were unavailable.

So, my mother took me to the store to buy a gift. We ended up selecting the unbiquitous Barbie. I wanted one too, and was denied. I was offered an imitation, which I refused. Imitation Barbies sucked. Parents who buy cheap toys will lie and say they are the same as the real type, but kids know the difference. Real Barbies don't have hollow legs and thin to bald hair, and clothes in strange colors like mustard yellow and eggplant.

So the damned doll was bought, taken home, and dutifully wrapped. I still wanted one of my own. The party was not for a couple of days, and the need to have This.Very.Doll. for My.Very.Own. grew and festered. So I unwrapped it, removed it from the box and played with it. The day of the party arrived, and I could not bear to part with the doll, nor could I put it back neatly in the box with all the twist ties that hold a Barbie captive in her box. So I hid it.

I knew where the wrapping paper was, the tape and scissors too. So I snatched up a dress from my closet floor and wrapped THAT up in the paper. Whichever parent drove me to the party was oblivious to the fact that my poorly wrapped gift was not in the size or shape of a Barbie box. And the wrapping was not quite up to the usual neatness one would expect.

I don't remember much about the party except that Jessicas parents gave me filthy looks, which only caused a momentary guilt response in me. At the time I just knew that I had my own darn doll, and that was all that mattered. For the record, I did have other dolls, and other Barbies, but I really needed this one.

It is only now, after over 20 years that I can think of things from Jessicas parents point of view - the dress I wrapped would have clearly been used, possibly stained, probably wrinkled and most likely not even the right size for Jessica. And though my parents had and have many faults, this level of tasteless gift giving is not one of them! I wonder if they ever thought that it was all me and not my parents who gave their little girl a used dress, so Marsha and Don P, if you ever read this, I am sorry.

And this, dear readers, is reason 25408 why I should not have my own children. There is no doubt that they would turn out EXACTLY like me!

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Birthday Loot and a movie review

I am now officially loving my job. When I interviewed, the owner told me all about how every one there was part of a big family and every person was just so special. Well, cynical little old me sort of blew that off as just a standard interview team player kind of speech. The other employees had told me that since the pay was not great and the benefits non-existent, that the owner tried to really make us happy anyway. I sort of blew that off too, since I am so new to the company, and again more than a little suspicious and cynical.

I was so wrong. I had mentioned that I am going through a bad breakup and didn't want to make my own cake, so the owner baked a cheesecake for me. Thats right. Homemade, with fresh strawberries on top!!!!

And there were streamers, balloons and GIFTS! I was blown away by the generosity, especially since I have only worked there for a month. I received the Happy perfume, along with the Clinique freebie bag (they are so expensive, but their giveaways are great!), a Lancome freebie bag with all sorts of goodies in it, a quilted gold travel toiletry bag (prettier than it sounds), oodles of bath and body works lotions and potions in a very pretty spring-y tote bag, lip balms (I am an addict), and assorted mani-pedi type things.

Not only was all of this a complete surprise to me, but it came at just the right time too. I have to think it is karma, and that for the moment, things are going exactly as they are meant to for me, and will only keep getting better.

I also received a package of goodies from GEM - 8 rings, 2 necklaces, a beaded lipstick holder and a wall hanging thing that says "wish upon a star". GEM is the worlds best shopper of thrift stores and flea markets and always finds amazing things, although some of my goodies were new. He is incredibly kind and generous, as well as thoughtful - and he sends funny little cards for virtually every holiday. I will have to send my next boyfriend to a boot camp with GEM on how to treat a person really well and find little trinkets for special occasions! He has been very supportive of me during all the issues with S., and though he does not always take my side, he is looking out for what is best for me and offers oints of view I might not have thought of otherwise. I hope all of you out there have such a great person in their lives.

On to the movies!

I watched "The Other Boleyn Girl" on Tuesday. Reader(s), save your money. I had read, and enjoyed, the Phillippa Gregory book it was based on, but the movie was so so much less than what it could have been. I had also read that Rue McClanahan (Blanche Devereaux from The Golden Girls) was in the movie. But she didn't have a speaking role that I heard, and I didn't even see her, which was disapointing. Anne just seemed like a petty bitch, and not the very smart and scheming person she seemed to be in her life. And Mary was a total pushover patsy, but I think in reality she was probably just as aware of the political climate she was living in as Anne, but the portrayal was so weak in this movie.

So the movie sort of sucked, but I was out and about enjoying myself on my birthday, so it wasn't a total loss. I think I want to see the ovie about Edith Piaf, La Vie En Rose next, not sure if it is out on DVD yet, but hopefully it will be soon if not already.

I am pleased with myself for another reason - I have three cards, written in, signed, sealed, addressed and stamped to go out in the mail tomorrow. I love getting non-bill mail, so I am sending it to other people as well, and I hope to do it more frequently. In GEM's card, I sent him a little sampler from the "Subversive Cross-stitch" line that says "Please don't do coke in the bathroom". GEM is not a former club kid per se, but he was very much on the prowl in the 80's and will hopefully get a kick out of it. I am also sending him a lovely purple crocus/lily one that I got the pattern for free online. I am getting craftier in my older age!

My new coworkers have also given me the heads up on some possible apartments to check out as well as some to avoid. All in all, things are going pretty well here in Marias World. And still I am not taking antidepressants. I think maybe I am just getting better because I am taking more control over my life, and I am going to keep moving forward and being more positive.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

It's my birthday

So today is my birthday. And reading my blog, I am not seeing all that I am. Most of the time I am very funny and snarky, but so far the blog has been more about heavier topics. So, I am going to try and balance things out more.

Yesterday S. bought me lunch at my favorite little Italian place. Not the Olive Garden. Lunch was delicious, but we then had a disastrous fight. I am pretty sure at this point there is nothing left to salvage between us. I shouldn't have even gone, because I KNOW he is not the one for me. But what was kind of liberating for me is that I ended up telling him (though not in a calm way) some of the things that were wrong, like his failure to stand up for me to his troglodyte friends. That had bothered me for a really long time, and I am glad I got it off of my mind.

But, happier news. My new job is having a little birthday party for me today. I think I will be getting some cake, and some more Happy perfume, which is what I usually wear. And while it does strike me as sad that I am getting more from virtual strangers at a new job than friends and family, I am happy to be getting anything at all. My new boss had asked me a few days ago what I wanted. I wasn't sure and she asked what perfumes I liked. I told her Happy, but I didn't want to ask for something expensive-ish like that from a job I have only had for a month. Now I am wondering if it is too late to request a subscription to e-Harmony!

And last but not least, I got into a conversation with a squirrel. I think. Eddie (the furball) was staring intently out the screen into the trees outside. So I crouched down next to him and saw a squirrel hanging out on a branch. It was making this chittering noise, and had Eddie enthralled. So I started imitating the sound. Both squirrel and cat looked at me in shock, then the squirrel began chittering back at me! It went back and forth for a few minutes, and the squirrel hopped down a few branches to be closer to this strange new thing talking to it. We all looked at one another and then the squirrel meandered away. I have no idea if the sounds I was making were threatening or more of a squirrelly greeting. I was probably the rodent equivalent of a babbling homeless person, but it was still a neat experience. I do like nature, although not things with more than four legs.

Eddie is not happy that I have a job. I have been home with him for almost a year, and when I come back from work he is more affectionate that he has ever been in his whole life. He follows me from room to room and cries when I close a door in between us. When I sit at the computer he no longer perches on the hutch above the monitor, instead he sprawls out next to the keyboard and tries to sleep with his head on my left hand. All this leads me to be thankful I do not have children; if I have this level of separation anxiety and neurotic-ness from a cat, there would be no hope of having a well adjusted child!