Suckitude

My feelings are hurt. I haven ot talked to GEM since Christmas. GEM is my best friend. We have never, in 10 years, had a fight. I am not sure if that is what we are having now, but whatever it is, it sucks.

My fault right now is that I only sent the Christmas presents last Friday. UPS should have delivered them today, but no word yet. Considering that there was a really pretty diamond ring in the package (GEM loves shinies almost as much as me), I am a little miffed.

My awesome and oh-so-grown-up plan was to wait for him to call me to say he received his (overdue) presents. Then let the answering machine pick up, so I can see what else he says. Brilliant, except he hasn't called.

I fel like I have been replaced. There is a friend (strictly a friend) in GEM's life that I think is spending waaaaay too much with GEM. No, this is not mere jealousy speaking. The new friend has issues. GEM, the guards at the prison GEM works at,and myself have all noticed disturbing behavior from this person. Seriously psychopathic - torturing animals, etc. I don't think it is smart for GEM to spend much time with new guy, but I have already voiced my opinions on that. GEM loves true crime almost as much as shinies, so there is a huge appeal in being close to someone who may truly have the capacity for serial killer like problems. I am not being overly dramatic here.

I suppose I could be the adult here and just call GEM, but I am hesitating and I am not sure why. Rejection? Maybe. Probably.

WTF

Someone broke into my best friends house today. 2 guns and a LOT of jewelry were taken,but all the pets are ok,and most of all, GEM is safe. GEM thinks he knows who did it, since a neighbor saw a strange car in his driveway and fingerprints were taken. I am angry and upset that someone so close to me was robbed, and feel very distraught that GEM has to go through this - I know he is feeling angry, vulnerable and invaded, and I am several states away and unable to help.

Last week, three of his goats died, in a strange way, and I really hope this is not related.

Happy for other people

I am happy for my best friend. He bought a new truck, has repaired the roof of his chicken house, installed lights in his barn, and had a new love interest. And I am just happy for him. There are very few people in my life that I am just happy for when they are happy. Not because I am a scrooge, but because I just don't have a lot of people in my life who care for and about me as I do for them. And I love GEM.

Why I love GEM

I had another marathon phone call with GEM today. He is mostly thrilled that I survived the date with "My Online Predator" as he calls my date, and very happy that I have found a very nice man, who has so far been wonderful in every way.

So I ended up going to the predators house on Monday, and returned with bite marks all over my neck. Yeah, I know. Wanton slut much, Maria? It isn't that bad, but I have very pale skin and I bruise if you look at me funny, let alone touch me!

Anyway, the point of the post title is my conversation with GEM

Me: I went over Monday and hung out with the predator, (ok more made out than hung out) but then I had to wear concealer to my interview because there were bite marks on my neck.

GEM: Why would he bite your neck?

Me: Because I like it!

GEM: Oh. (lets it sink in) OOOOH!

Good Luck to me

I have two job interviews tomorrow. TWO! One at a doctors office and the other for a DME company. Hoping like mad I will get the doctors office position. Have new and hopefully lucky navy suit ready to go, and all of my interview charm on deck for schmoozing.

Pay sucks in this area, so I will most likely keep the other job on Friday and Saturday nights, but I can do that - for a while anyway.

Talked to GEM for 3 hours tonight - discussed clothing for interview and everything else under the sun, including some very appreciated confidence in me and my abilities. I love GEM. He is such the perfect firend for me. I may not have had much luck finding a romantic life partner, but so glad I have GEM in my life.

WOW

I had a little epiphany last night. I LIKE going out and meeting friends.

I had truly forgotten that.

For the past year, I have been home almost every day. There were some weeks that I may have only left the house once or twice. Moving here, and not knowing anyone is truly horrible for me. And S. would never go out anywhere that didn't involve food, preferably fried, and even that was rare.

So I am not a total social butterfly, but being out last night for a book club made me feel happier than I have in a while. Since the first book club seems to be disbanding - several military moves - I was happy to see another member at the new one. And I have another fledgling book club meeting later this month. Things like this make me think that I just may be ok.

And now the snark.

I like books. I like people who like books. And I am not a total snob. HOWEVER, suggesting romance novels for a book club made me snicker, although inwardly so as not to be rude. Seriously, how much discussion about plot and foreshadowing are you gonna get out of any book with Fabio carrying a woman in a Victorian nightie on the cover?

One good thing, and OMG

The good thing. I have an online penpal. Its a divorced older guy, neither one of us is looking to hook up, and I am not sure we will even ever meet IRL, BUT it is a live person I can talk to, and I so needed that.

The OMG?
Tropic Thunder.
So I have always loved Robert Downey Junior. Back in the 90's I figured if I could just get to Hollywood, I could have him married, divorced and cashed the first alimony check before he even sobered up. Not great for a long term relationship, but one hell of a fun ride while it lasted, right?

But the best part is not even RDJ, though it saddens me to say it. Tom "Batshit Crazy" Cruise had the best fucking part in the movie, and I would have been willing to watch 15 more minutes of his roayl craziness. It is that funny.

I don't buy a lot of movies. There are very few that I will re-watch, and those that I do are always on re-runs - Steel Magnolias (Don't talk about me like I'm not here!), The Breakfast Club, etc. But I am for sure for sure renting this one for the special effects, and may eventually buy it on Amazon when it goes for five bucks or less. Cause I'm cheap.

And thank you, to Loyal Reader Jen for all the kind comments and just letting me know someone out there is hearing (reading?) me.

RIP Buster

GEM called me this morning. His dog Buster had been sick last week and just died. I am not sure what caused it, he was only a little over a year old and the other 3 dogs are fine.

This sucks. I lost my kitty after 17 years in January, and I am still devastated when I think about it. Not to make this about me though. What I am getting at is that I know how bad GEM is hurting and I hate that I can't do anything to make him feel better. I called him back and left a message saying I was sorry and all, but there is not a single thing that will make it hurt any less and I hate to see the people I care about in any pain.

GEM is battling his sister in a lawsuit over the estate of their father and aunt, has not been in a steady relationship for several years, works in a prison, which is depressing as all hell, but still manages to send cards and gifts to friends and family on every holiday on the calendar. Not everybody "gets" him, but those who do are very lucky to have him in their lives. Some people think he is gruff, but he is such a softie. His horses are basically lawn ornaments, since he just enjoys having them and does not ride them. And his dogs provide much needed company, and scare off raccons and other critters from the chickens. Buster is going to be missed.

Unfortunately, GEM firmly believes that bad things happen threes. 2 months ago, Busters sister Lucy, who lived with GEMS mothers, was hit by a car and died, in front of GEMs mothers. I hope that the bad things stop happening at two, because GEM doesn't need another loss.

I love you GEM, I miss you, and I would do anything to make this better if I could.

What's wrong with his mouth, and why is it brown?

I adore my friend GEM. He and I totally get each other and have the same wickedly warped sense of humor. GEM has 4 dogs. Wednesday, while we were talking on the phone, they came tearing inside his house. One of them, Buster, paused at the door, near GEM, then bolted inside, and scampered around the corner, clearly trying to avoid notice. Not so fast, little guy. GEM noticed and asked the now infamous question above. GEMs dogs are small, sleek, black and white terriers. Busters mouth was now fluffy and brown. Because it was full of squirrel. Still warm and twitchy, but dead, squirrel. Ew.

GEM has a small creek running through his little farm. He wanted to send the squirrel down the river so to speak. To his freaky neighbors house. A little back info on the neighbor.

1. They are some strange cult of some sort.
2. They have a large handmade billboard in their yard with some Bible quote on it.
3. They have 3 or 4 teen boy children, who are only allowed outside to do chores.
4. Said children are surprisingly normal considering they are homeschooled, and by that I mean they are taught limited ideas from the bible, by their HS dropout mom, and given liberal viewings of Little House On The Prairie.
5. 2 summers ago, one of their horses died, of mysterious causes. The horse was dragged out of the barn by the whole famile, and covered in sheeting. Then it sat for 4 days until they had it hauled away.

All in all, GEM doesn't really care for the neighbors, although the boys have helped him clear some pasture with him. I suggested that he make a small sign of a 3x5 card saying "Repent Sinners" tie it on the rodent, and fling it on the neighbors porch. It is a very good thing that the two of us can cackle together over evil ideas, and not actually do them, yes?

I have known GEM for 8 years now, and I am so happy to count him as a friend. His actual initials do spell out GEM, which is amusing to me, because he has more jewelry than he knows what to do with. His house is like a pirates treasure trove with jewelry boxes everywhere. He is very generous, and my collection of "real" jewelry has increased significantly since I met him. I am looking forward to buying him a special piece of jewelry for our 10 year anniversary of being best friends, but the man already owns more jewelry than King Tut. And people say women are hard to shop for.

GEM does not have a computer or know how to access the internet. I love being able to find an out of print book he has been combing thrift shops for, in a matter of seconds, on Amazon, and sending it to him. I feel like the Wizard of Oz. It seems amazing that I can find things, but really anyone could do it. I asked GEM why he didn't have a computer, because surely he would love it and become hooked on it. He replied that that is exactly the reason he has never done crack either.